You know what, you're a really great mum


Sometimes you just want to hear 'you know what, you're a really great mum' or 'you're doing such a great job raising xyz'.

The years may be short but the days really can be long, especially when friends fall by the wayside as their calls get fewer and farther between. It's lonely being a mumma sometimes and you end up with the strangest times for reflection ... When you're not too busy second guessing yourself.

This is not a self pitying post but rather, an honest share of motherhood, my motherhood, without the glitter and gloss.

I adore my little guy, quite simply, he and my husband are the best things that ever happened to me but its been tough. Really really tough some days, and lots of nights.

I had a great pregnancy in the respect that I had no morning sickness and felt good the majority of the time until pre-eclampsia really took hold and I was forced to slow down before being induced. Fast forward to post partum and I had an enormous health scare along with a new baby who didn't sleep and screamed or fed almost all the time(but when he wasn't screaming, my goodness he was angelic). I then headed back to work early on which was a saviour in someways and destroyed parts of me in others ... I was wracked by guilt, tormented and bullied by some and so stretched for moments let alone minutes that people lost understanding and simply walked away.

Both a special group of new mothers who were near strangers then and my sister became my rock at this time. My confidants that supported, encouraged, motivated and dried my tears more than they could ever know when Ethan yet again was up every hour of the night, when every well intentioned person had an opinion on what was 'wrong' with my baby, when we went through some frightening health scares with E and I and other times when I just felt so lonely. Without the support of these women, I quite probably could have spiraled to a very scary place but thankfully I'll never know. One of the very best pieces of advice I can share with any new mum is to find a support group whether its a playgroup, a mothers group facilitated by child health or an online forum because a group of like-minded women who are going through the same things as you can really make a big difference.

Sometimes those hard days feel like they will never ever end and those perfect days seem to pass all too quickly. Those hard days are easily made better by just a few kind words from someone who matters to you ... Along with an innocent baby smile and nowadays, the bestowing of a leaf or a cracker wrapper. It feels though that the people we most crave to acknowledge us are never aware of just how much we want their praise and just how much it would mean.

My mum is quite simply, the very best mum ever in the history of mums. She was one of those women who was born to be a mother and I thank God every single day that she's my mum and Ethan's grandmother. She is the kindest most compassionate caring person you will ever be lucky enough to meet but she's also tough and she raised us that way too - because mean mothers have the best children and truly, I'm still scared to use a swear word in her presence. I hope to be just half the mum she is and I try to emulate her in my own parenting.

My mum is the one person I wish so much would say, just once, 'you know what, you're a really great mum.'

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